Twelve Tons of REAL Kit Kats (Not the Cheap Imitations) Go Missing!

A New Take On “The Italian Job”? Gimme a Break!

Wow! According to the AP this morning, “Swiss food giant Nestlé says about 12 tons, or 413,793 candy bars, of its Kit Kat chocolate brand, were stolen after leaving its production site in Italy earlier this week for Poland.”

I weep for the 413,793 Polish consumers who will thus be deprived of their favorite chocolaty ambrosia. Imagine, a truckload of creamy milk chocolate and delicate wafer candy bars made by a world famous Swiss company at a production facility in central Italy (probably in Perugia, where they also know a thing or two about chocolate) just sitting out there waiting for the right buyer.

My phone number is (555) 321-….......oh, never mind. I could never afford the tariffs. But if I could, man, that many Kit Kats would least me at least a month! (Or so.)

KitKats and I go back to about 1960, when some sainted buyer introduced them to the place my dad was working at the time and he bought one for me. It was l-o-v-e at first bite! Oh, don't get me wrong; I still craved my Nestlé's Crunch bars and continued to drool over Peter Paul's Mounds, but after that first encounter, nothing made my dopamine go ding-dong like a Kit Kat bar.

Now, those were the days, my friend, when Kit Kats were still made in England by Rowntree of York. In fact, the word “Rowntree” was emblazoned in script on each of the four “fingers” of confectionery perfection. Tracing its roots back to a worker's recommendation box suggestion for a “chocolate bar that a man could work in his pack up,” Rowntree's Chocolate Crisp, as it was originally known, sold for tuppence when it was introduced in 1935. The “Kit Kat” moniker came along two years later.

Initially marketed in London and southern England, Kit Kat caught on like wildfire and by the end of the next decade had spread throughout the UK and it's commonwealth countries – also making a big splash in its former colony across the Pond.

Alas, but all good things must end, and Kit Kat, sadly, ended up being licensed in 1970 to the Hershey Company, that abominable place in Pennsylvania where once-decent chocolate goes to be transformed into unappealing, sugary brown wax. A little piece of my childhood perished the day I bit into a Hershey's Kit Kat. (Sigh) Oh, I kept buying them – out of habit more than anything else – but neither my heart nor my taste buds were really in it anymore.

And then one blessed day, I happened to be aboard a cruise ship that sold Kit Kat bars in one of the onboard shops. Listlessly, I bought one, unwrapped it, and prepared for the now-familiar sense of disappointment. O. M. G! It was a freakin' real, honest-to-goodness and good chocolate KIT KAT BAR!!

As I repeatedly pinched myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming or hadn't stepped into a DeLorean with Doc Brown at the wheel, I read the label. “Made in England.” Hmmm....

It seems that even though Hershey holds the US license for Kit Kat, Nestlé – who acquired Rowntree in 1988 – still makes them at the old plant in York and in several other European locations, and distributes them worldwide. La mia salvezza è portato di mano! Now all I had to do to get my Kit Kat fix was to take a cruise every couple of weeks! Wait......surely there's a less cost-prohibitive way to enjoy the earthly pleasure of heavenly chocolate.

Knowing and sympathetic friends who took cruises and/or traveled to Europe always made it a point to bring me care packages of as many Kit Kats as they could squeeze into their luggage. I was grateful.

Then, on another fortuitous foray, I stumbled upon a little downtown British import shop that carried lots of Dairy Milk and other Cadbury products, Maltesers, and......and.....yes! English-made Kit Kats! I immediately bought them out and became one of their best regulars.

Unfortunately, my passion for Kit Kats wasn't enough to sustain them in business....but by the time they went under, I had discovered World Market and to this day I am a deliriously happy Kit Kat camper.

Go on. Head over to WM and buy one. You'll immediately understand why somebody heisted twelve tons of them in Europe. See, British milk chocolate requires a higher minimum percentage of cocoa solids and milk fat than American “chocolate.” In other words, there's actually milk in their milk chocolate, not a cheap artificial substitute. This alone makes for a smoother, less waxy texture. And as for the flavor, European chocolate contains higher fat and cocoa content. This creates a much richer, fuller, more rounded and less intensely sweet taste by comparison to American chocolate products.

So....ah.....hey, if you're in the market for some real Kat Kat bars, I know a guy.......who works at World Market. Meet me there when they open tomorrow. I'll be the one with the oversize tote bag.

Air Is Your Enemy!

At Least Where Freshness Is Concerned

I had to wince the other day as I watched a friend “reseal” a resealable plastic bag containing shredded cheese. She took out a handful of cheese and then just zipped the bag closed and stuck it back in the refrigerator. “But isn't that what you're supposed to do with a resealable bag,” you ask? The answer is an emphatic “no!” When that bag went back in the fridge, it looked like a little plastic pillow. It was absolutely full of air.

I thought everybody knew better, but apparently I was mistaken. There is nothing that will render food stale or spoiled faster than prolonged exposure to air. Why do you think they make “resealable” bags in the first place? It's so you can seal in the freshness by sealing out the air. And my friend just sealed a whole bagful of air in with her shredded cheese.

Air, or more precisely the oxygen in it, causes all manner of nasty things to happen to stored food. “Oxidation” is what the scientific types call it, and it can make fatty foods go rancid and promote changes in color, texture and flavor in many other foods.

Biting into a limp, rancid-tasting potato chip is bad enough, but even worse things can occur in the presence of air. A sealed plastic bag full of air is a marvelous growth environment for airborne microorganisms like bacteria, molds and yeasts. And, since air usually brings moisture to the party, it's like a trip to the beach for those little critters that cause microbial spoilage. Which is, by the way, the number one cause of good food going bad.

Let's take that air-filled bag of cheese, for example. If my friend were to just leave that cheese out in the open air, it could start to spoil within a few hours. By sealing the air in with the cheese, she's pretty much guaranteeing a rapid decline in quality, to say nothing of safety. Refrigerating it is not the answer. All though it helps, some agents of spoilage aren't impressed by temperature until it gets down to sub-freezing levels. No, they'll just chill out and start covering the cheese with green and white mold. Next time she opens that bag...oooh, surprise!

Speaking, as we were, of potato chips, I'm sure you've noticed that they come packed full of air right from the factory. As a matter of fact, a common complaint is that there's more air in the bag than there is product.

But, it's not really regular ol' air that's taking up all that slack space, as they call it in the snack food industry. It's actually nitrogen gas. Seems that back around 1994, researchers discovered that exposing chips and such to nitrogen made them taste better for longer. So the industry started sealing chips in a nitrogen-infused environment to keep them crisp and tasty as opposed to soggy and nasty. Which is what you get when you open a bag of snacks and put it back in the cupboard or pantry without expelling all the air you let in when you opened the bag. No, you can't replace the nitrogen, but at least if you expel the excess air before you seal the bag with a chip clip or whatever, you'll preserve the taste and texture for far longer than if you trap air inside the bag. Same thing applies to cookies and crackers and snack cakes. They probably won't “go bad” as in “kill you deader than a hammer” bad or even make you sick as a dog bad, but they sure won't be as appealing after a few days in an air-filled environment.

And how about those leftovers you put in the zip-top bag? Did you just fill the bag with food and then top it off with a nice layer of air? Might as well have not bothered with zipping up the bag.

Same thing, by the way, if you're using plastic or glass storage containers with lids. Don't just snap the lid on after you fill the container. The makers of Tupperware used to highlight a little feature on the lids of their products that allowed you to “burp” them to get rid of any air inside before you sealed the container. You don't have to have a special “burp” button, just press down on the lid a little before you seal the bowl.

Whether it be cheese or chips or cookies or leftover veggies, it only takes a second to squeeze the air out of the bag – or bowl – before you seal it up. You have to develop the habit of doing it until it becomes instinctive. Muscle memory. Expel the air then seal the container. I've been doing so long that I don't even have to think about.

Now, I'm not saying you have to be a real fanatic about it. Just press or roll the bag until you get as much air out as possible. You're never going to get all the air out; just aim for doing the best you can.

Some folks swear by the water displacement method, whereby you partially seal your seal-able bag and then lower it into a pot of water, allowing the water pressure to push out any air in the bag before you finish sealing it. This is a tried and true method that works well with zip-top bags and such, but I wouldn't recommend it for sealing up an open bag of Doritos.

Then there are questionable tips like leaving an open corner and using a straw to suck the air out of the bag. Meh. That one's been around for a while. No less a resource than the venerable Good Housekeeping magazine actually recommended it at one time. But, I don't care if you just rinsed your mouth with a quart of Listerine, there's gonna be a few germs left in your oral orifice and do you really want to give them a free ride down into your leftovers? Just sayin'.

You could go off the deep end and buy a vacuum sealer. Greatest thing since sliced bread if you're into sous vide cooking (which I am) or if you buy in bulk and want to put stuff up for freezing (which I do.) As you might have guessed, I have one. But even I'm not dedicated enough to the cause of freshness to use it for day-to-day things. Besides the cost of endless vacuum sealer bags, I'm not sure how well the process would work with potato chips. I'm sure whatever crumbs would be left after the sealer got through with the chips would be undeniably fresh, but.....you know. (Actually, I saw a gadget online the other day – a mini bag sealer – that does nothing but seal the kind of bags that chips and snacks come in, but....really?)

No, just stick with pressing the air out and then sealing the bag/container as quickly as you can. As I said, you're not gonna get all the air out, but you'll do a helluva lot better of keeping your food nominally fresh than if you just chunk little air-filled plastic pillows into the refrigerator or pantry.

Remember, when it comes to food freshness and safety, it's far better to expel than to leave an air cell. (I know; it's a stretch but it's the best I could do.)

Thoughts On McDonald's Perennially Broken Ice Cream Machines

A Strange Irony

When I was young and so was McDonald's (we were both born the same year), my go-to order at the home of the Golden Arches was some of their life-changing French fries and an icy-cold, creamy chocolate milkshake. Later, after Ronald McDonald started selling soft-serve ice cream at his establishments, McDonald's became a great place to stop for a quick cone. Mickey Ds locations were a heck of a lot easier to find than Dairy Queen's and the product they served was almost as good. Almost.

Alas, somewhere around 1990, McDonald's caved in to the activist campaign to eliminate fat and cholesterol in the American diet and stopped frying its exquisite shoestring spuds in beef tallow, opting instead for bland, flavorless vegetable oil. This switch from animal renderings to vegetable squeezings immediately “rendered” McDonald's fries inert, dull, and lifeless. They became nothing more than a run-of-the-mill vehicle to deliver salt and a modicum of texture to your palate.

But, hey! At least we still had ice cream, right? And delicious, fresh, creamy shakes? Eh, not so much. The ice cream formula changed, too. In fact, it literally became a “formula” instead of a fresh dairy product.

And now we don't even have that last vestige of so many youthful memories. Have you tried to order any ice cream products from McDonald's lately? Good luck finding one with an operating ice cream machine. It's actually become an Internet thing: you can go online and find dozens of sites dedicated to tracking and cataloging McDonald's non-operating ice cream machines. There's even an app for it.

However you look at it, it's frustrating as hell. You get your mouth all set for something and whammo! “I'm sorry. Our ice cream machine is out of order.” That's what I heard the other day when, after a warm afternoon of yard work, my wife said, “Hey, why don't you run over to McDonald's and get us some fries and shakes?” Sorry, honey. Settle for a nice cup of water with those fries? At least I didn't go to the extreme that three women went to in Daytona Beach. When they ordered ice cream at the drive-thru and were told the machine was down, they went into the restaurant and proceeded to beat up the kid behind the counter. Or the guy in Delray Beach who pulled a gun on the drive-thru worker when he was told the ice cream machine wasn't working. Obviously, people in Florida take their ice cream very seriously.

Now, I was going to try to do some in-depth research into the phenomenon in order to find some explanation that I could pass on to you desperate, ice cream-starved readers. But, lo and behold, one Andy Greenberg over at Wired has already done way, way more legwork than I'd ever dreamed possible and has detailed everything you've ever wanted to know about McDonald's ice cream machine woes right here. Read it and.....weep.

Speaking of weeping, I'll bet Ray Kroc is weeping in his grave as he spins like one of the five spindles on his iconic “Multimixer 9B.” Isn't it a bit of strange irony that a burger chain founded by a guy who sold milkshake machines for a living should be in such straits today? Totally at the mercy of wonky digital technology?

C'mon, McDonald's! It's the twenty-first century. We have personal computers in our pockets and helicopters on Mars. Don't ya think you could come up with an ice cream machine that works at least fifty percent of the time? Surely somebody's got a cache of the old manual clunkers in the basement somewhere. Drag 'em out! At least they were dependable.

As I said before, McDonald's and I have a long history. I actually went to Store #1 when I was a kid. Located in west suburban Chicago, just off US Hwy 12 in Des Plaines, Ray Kroc always said it was his favorite store before they tore it down and rebuilt it as a museum. Even as a museum, you could see a mannequin in a paper hat standing by what I'm sure was a working shake machine. Ah, for the good old days.

Bah dah bah bah bah, McDonald's, when it comes to your perennially malfunctioning ice cream machines, I'm not lovin' it.

Gelato – It's Not Just “Ice Cream”

Gelato Is Definitely Something More

It's summertime. Temperatures are in the 90s around here and folks are actively seeking ways to cool off. Air conditioners and swimming pools are the order of the day, and so is ice cream. I'm fortunate enough to have a little ice cream stand within walking distance. But, alas, as refreshing as a scoop of good ol' classic rocky road ice cream might be, it still pales in comparison to Italian gelato.

“Now wait a minute,” you say. “I thought 'gelato' was just the Italian word for 'ice cream.'” Ah, not so. You have much to learn, young Padawan.

Ice cream and gelato share one thing in common – they're both frozen. Beyond that, there are a lot of differences. Oh sure, they'll both cool you off, but so will a glass of ice water. No, you want something more out of your frozen confection, and gelato is definitely something more: more creamy, more smooth and silky, and more flavorful. Why? Glad you asked.

Scientifically speaking, any frozen confection – whether ice cream, gelato, sorbet, custard, or yogurt – is a mixture of water molecules and fat molecules. Doesn't that sound cool and refreshing? Freezing these molecules causes crystals to form. The longer you freeze the mixture, the bigger the crystals get. And then you factor in air, which is introduced through the churning process. The more air you pump into the mixture, the softer and fluffier the mixture becomes. American ice cream producers call this “overrun” and American ice cream can contain as much as fifty percent air. Gelato, on the other hand, contains only twenty to thirty percent air.

Both ice cream and gelato contain cream, milk and sugar. But the ratios are quite different. Ice cream goes heavy on the cream and also uses egg yolks as a binder. Gelato is more milk than cream and it rarely, if ever, uses eggs. Because ice cream uses more cream, it also produces more butterfat. In order to qualify as ice cream, a product has to contain at least ten percent butterfat. Most American ice creams weigh in at anywhere between fourteen and twenty-five percent. Gelato, on the other hand, is only four to nine percent fat.

Less air means a denser, creamier texture and less fat makes for a lighter mixture. And since fat tends to coat the palate, gelato's lower fat content allows more flavor to come through.

One more technical factor: temperature. Gelato is usually served slightly warmer than ice cream; about ten to fifteen degrees warmer. Colder ice cream actually numbs your tongue and inhibits flavor intensity. Warmer gelato brings out the full flavor potential of the confection.

It used to be you'd have to hop a plane to Florence or Rome in order to find gelato. Not so anymore. Sales of the frozen treat are blazing hot in the US, where gelato sales rose from $11 million in 2009 to an estimated $214 million in 2014. Industry analysts projected gelato would garner a 32 percent share of America's $14.3 billion ice cream market by the end of 2016.

Gelaterie (that's the proper Italian plural for gelateria; you don't just add an “s” to make things plural in Italian) are popping up all over the country. Sure, you'd expect them in places with large Italian populations; cities like New York or Chicago. But I was pleasantly surprised to find a great gelateria in downtown Austin, Texas and a chocolatier who served delicious gelato in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. The real inroads, however, are being made in the supermarket, where increasing shelf space in the freezer case is being given over to a product that was a niche market curiosity just a decade or so ago. Talenti is the largest producer of gelato in America. Headquartered in Minneapolis and named as a tribute to Bernardo Buontalenti, the Florentine artist credited with inventing gelato, Talenti products are probably the easiest to find in most American supermarkets, but Breyer's and other ice cream makers are also jumping on the gelato bandwagon in a big way. And while that's good from a product recognition standpoint, it's not always so good from a product quality standpoint. A lot of what's being marketed as “gelato” these days is nothing more than thinly disguised ice cream with a fancy label and a fancier price tag.

So how do you find good gelato? To begin with, you're probably not going to find it in a supermarket. For one thing, it's all thrown in the freezer with the ice cream. Remember what I said about gelato being served at a warmer temperature? So that means seeking out a gelateria or at least an ice cream joint that offers gelato. Many of them do. But what should you look for?

One of the first things is color. Good quality gelato is made up primarily of natural ingredients. There are no artificial preservatives, additives, or dyes. So any neon-colored gelato you encounter is likely not very high quality. I saw some bright green “pistachio” gelato in an ice cream shop. Sorry, but natural pistachios are brownish in color and pistachio gelato should be too. Although brightly colored berry gelati are pretty to look at, they should really be more muted in color. Natural fruits are seldom as brilliant as their artificial counterparts. And while you're looking at the gelato, take note of whether or not it looks shiny. It shouldn't. Shiny gelato either has too many sugars in it or it has oxidized, a sign of age.

Check out the selection of flavors. Simple, natural flavors are always best. Plain, for instance, or what Italians call fior di latte or fior di panna. This is just gelato with the natural flavor of milk or cream. Maybe vanilla, but be careful that the producer isn't trying to mask inferior milk or cream with vanilla flavoring. Chocolate is good, as are seasonal fruit flavors. Italian gelatiers introduced Parmesan gelato at a festival in Rimini a couple of years ago. Goofy novelty flavors like bubblegum and tutti fruitti are usually loaded with artificial ingredients. Whatever the flavor, tasting it should be a very forward experience. The flavor is up front in a quality gelato. It should grab you by the taste buds. If you can't quite figure out what you're eating, it's probably not very good quality.

There should be a marked textural difference between gelato and ice cream. Gelato is smooth, silky, and dense. If what you put in your mouth is light and airy with noticeable crystals, you've either got poor quality gelato or you've got ice cream.

Finally, look at the container from which the gelato is served. Is the product piled high in fluffy mounds? If so, it probably contains a lot of fat and/or emulsifiers. Is it being served from a plastic tub? That's pretty much a no-no when it comes to good gelato, which is usually served from a metal tub or tray. And because gelato is denser than ice cream, a flat metal spade is a better serving implement than a round metal (or plastic) scoop.

Summertime, and the livin' is.......sticky. Cool off today with some delicious gelato. It's way more than “ice cream.”  

Easy, Perfect Popcorn

Movie Theater Quality Without Expensive Poppers And Questionable Ingredients

To say that I love popcorn would be a tremendous understatement. Statistics show that the average American consumes approximately sixty-eight quarts – or seventeen gallons – of popcorn annually. Boy, am I above average! Think I exaggerate? I was once given a bushel bag of popcorn as a gift. That's thirty-two quarts. It lasted me about two weeks.

Not only do I know a good bit about eating popcorn, I'm pretty proficient at popping it, too. In fact, my first paid employment was popping popcorn in a small town movie theater. But I had been burning Jiffy Pop at home long before that gig. (Seriously, did anybody ever get that stuff to completely pop without burning at least half of it?) Fortunately, Jiffy Pop was just a fad in my house. My mother had a special pot she reserved for popping popcorn when I was a kid and she instructed me in the finer points of its use when I was barely tall enough to stand at the stove without a stool. So popcorn and I go way back.

Over the decades I've utilized every popping gadget that ever came down the pike. Besides the aforementioned failed Jiffy Pop, I've popped corn in a regular kettle on the stove top, I've used one of those wire mesh poppers over a campfire, and I've had a couple of “Whirly Pop” poppers, which weren't too bad except for the ones with plastic gears that quickly wore out. I burned myself severely with an old-fashioned electric popper back in the late '60s. A defective handle on the kettle caused it to overturn and spill smoking hot oil all over my hand, arm, and down my leg. Not fun. I've had limited success with various versions of microwave popping devices and I've gone through a couple of hot air poppers over the years. The most reliable of those is an Orville Redenbacher-branded popper made by Presto. I spent a little over twenty bucks on it about ten years ago and it's still going strong. And, of course, I've used the heavy-duty theater units. I'd install one of those suckers in my kitchen in a heartbeat if I had the space and the money, but I don't, so I make do with the household models. (Sigh)

And then there's microwave popcorn, an entity unto itself. Technically, microwave popcorn was “invented” back around 1946 as a whole-cob-in-a-bag affair, but the popular form that we know now has its roots in the early '70s when General Mills developed the first practical popping bag for individual kernels. Pillsbury sold microwave popcorn out vending machines in the mid-to-late '70s. I know, because I worked just down the road from Pillsbury's test kitchen in Minneapolis back then and we had some of their very first microwave popcorn in our cafeteria.

Microwave popcorn quality is an “iffy” proposition at best. Some varieties are really good and some are absolutely awful. Add to that the fact that the good stuff can be a little pricey. Then factor in recent health concerns: A report from the FDA indicates that a chemical coating used in microwave popcorn bags breaks down when heated into a substance called perfluorooctanoic (PFOA). The Environmental Protection Agency has identified PFOA as a “likely carcinogen.” Besides the “likely carcinogen” part, there's what's actually in the bag to consider. Like nearly everything else on the market, microwave popcorn is loaded with additives and preservatives. Tertiary Butylhydroquinone? I've never seen that one offered as a movie theater topping. And several popular microwave brands still contain trans-fat, which is a proven no-no when it comes to heart disease.

But don't despair, fellow popcorn lovers; I've got some good news for you. There is a way you can have delicious, light, fluffy perfect popcorn that is on a par with movie theater product in your own home without expensive poppers and without questionable ingredients. And it is super fast and stupid simple.

I wish I could take credit for this method, but I can't: I stumbled on it quite by accident. It's not a “new” idea by any means, but it's one that for whatever reason has never gotten a lot of traction. The version I came across is credited to Alton Brown. Somebody needs to nominate Alton Brown for sainthood or knighthood or some kind of hood because the man is frickin' brilliant. I modified Alton's simple microwave method just an eensy-weensy bit and produced a batch of popcorn that left me gasping for breath and grasping for superlatives. I told my wife, “Try this,” and then had to wrestle her to get the bowl back.

Here's what you need:

Popcorn (duh!)

From the “did you know” department, did you know there are actually two types of popcorn? Yep. Mushroom and butterfly. Butterfly popcorn is the more common variety. It is irregular in shape with multiple “wings” protruding from each kernel. Butterfly is judged to be more tender and fluffy and has fewer hulls. Mushroom popcorn is more compact and ball-shaped and pops up looking like.....a mushroom, and is the type used for caramel corn and kettle corn and such because it's tougher and can handle the handling needed to apply the coatings. The choice is yours. You'll want ¼ cup.

Salt

Alton uses plain ol' table salt. This is one area in which we differ: I like popcorn salt. It's a super fine salt specifically designed to adhere to popcorn. It comes in flavors, with butter flavor being the most common, but the plain unflavored variety is fine. Again, your choice. You'll want ¼ teaspoon.

Alton stops there. I go one tiny step further and recommend oil.

Most popcorn popping pros use some form of coconut oil. Yeah, that's why movie theater popcorn always tastes better than the stuff you make at home using Wesson. While I prefer coconut oil, I had some Orville Redenbacher's Buttery Flavor Popping & Topping Popcorn Oil on hand. It's made of soybean oil but it's an acceptable substitute since you'll only need a few drops.

Finally, a paper lunch bag. A plain brown (or white) flat bottom, gusset side, self standing lunch bag.

And here's what you do:

Scoop or pour your popcorn into a ¼ cup measuring cup. Pour on the salt and dribble on a few drops of oil. Drops, mind you, not a stream or even a drizzle. If the oil reaches the bottom of the cup and you have to wipe it out, you've probably used too much.

Dump the prepared popcorn into the bag, shake it up a little, and tightly fold over the top of the bag two or three times. Alton used to recommend a staple to close the bag, but some people got all freaky and thought it would blow up the microwave, so just make sure you have a good, tight fold at the top.

When popping popcorn, timing is way more important than time. You have to pop by ear. (Sorry.) If your set your timer to 1:45 and walk away, you'll come back to an ugly mess because the popcorn finished popping and start burning at 1:30. And don't use the “popcorn” button. Most microwaves, especially older models, lack humidity sensors and just rely on a preset time. Your ear is your best indicator. The popping will start out slow, then it will increase and get really vigorous for a few seconds and then it will trail off until you only hear a “pop” every few seconds. That's when you want to pull your bag out of the microwave. Three or four unpopped kernels in the bottom is a lot better than a whole bunch of burned ones.

That's it. When you unfold the top of the bag, you'll be amazed at what's inside.

I was skeptical at first. “Oh, this is too easy,” I thought. “There's got to be a catch.” Nope. It really is that simple. And OM-freakin'-G, is it good! Like I said, popcorn and I go way back and this was easily some of the best stuff I ever ate, regardless of popping method.

So I'm going to make my wife happy and toss one kitchen unitasker: goodbye, microwave popper! My pots and pans will now only be used for cooking, not popping, and my venerable hot air popper will just gather dust. Better still, we will never again waste money on microwave popcorn or worry about any possible related health considerations.

With a new stock of corn and paper bags laid in, I'm ready to start popping. Let's see......1/4 cup of unpopped popcorn is equal to two ounces and that yields about two quarts popped. I just bought five pounds of popping corn......that's eighty ounces.......wow! I'm really gonna be above average!

Confessions Of A Recovered Processed Food Eater

Wandering In The Processed Food Wasteland

If you are a regular reader of my scribblings – and I hope you are – you'll know that I frequently pontificate on the evils of processed food. In a simpler day and time, you could go to the food market and come home with.....food. Nowadays you come home with chemical-laden food-like substances that your forebears would not have even recognized as edible. In order to really understand what passes as “food” today, you need a degree in chemical engineering. Or do you actually know what azodicarbonamide, butylated hydroxyanisole, and butylated hydroxytoluene are and what they do? My oft-expressed opinion is that I'd prefer to be embalmed after I'm dead rather than before. I love farmers markets, butcher shops, and produce stands and I am constantly on the stump for cooking with fresh, natural ingredients. And yet, for all my holier-than-thou elitist food snobbery, I must confess to being a recovered processed food eater.

Oh yes, there was a time when I was a Wonder Bread warrior. Little Debbie was my bestie. After I swore off Twinkies, Ho-Hos, and Ding-Dongs, Hostess promptly went bankrupt. I talk a lot about learning to cook at a very young age, but in truth much of that “cooking” involved Kraft, Campbell's, and Ore-Ida. Mario Batali is my favorite Italian chef today, but back then I was all about Chef Boyardee. And it was all my mother's fault.

It wasn't that my mother couldn't cook; she was amazingly accomplished in the kitchen. Ask her any question about almost anything cooking-related and she could answer. She could do everything imaginable with chicken, beef, pork, or turkey. We had a garden out back and she could cook any vegetable you pulled from the soil. She made delicious sauces from scratch. She baked heavenly breads and rolls and her homemade cookies, brownies, cakes, and pies were legendary. No, it wasn't that my mother didn't know her way around a kitchen. Rather it was that she was part of a generation of women browbeaten by Madison Avenue marketing into believing that “old fashioned” cooking was antiquated drudgery and that “modern” methods were the wave of the future. Women were encouraged to “escape” from the kitchen as if it were emblematic of a master and slave relationship. “Convenience” was the new culinary religion and the twin gods “Quick” and “Easy” were worshiped through holy scripture printed on the backs of boxes and cans. And Mom gradually became an ardent acolyte.

Mom could make macaroni and cheese from scratch, but why bother when Kraft put everything she needed in a bright blue box? Sure she could boil potatoes and mash them up with milk and butter, but Hungry Jack made it so much faster. Why waste fifteen minutes on “long-cooking” rice when Minute Rice made it happen in five? Two minutes and a can of Campbell's tomato soup was sure easier than fooling with all those tomatoes and onions and butter and herbs and spices for an hour or more. And why go through the hassle of stocks and broths when Campbell's put chicken soup in a can?

Dishes like tuna noodle casserole were the haute cuisine of the day. Combine packaged egg noodles, canned tuna, canned soup, mayonnaise from a jar, maybe a bag of frozen peas and a topping out of a box of crackers or cornflakes and you were practically a master chef.

If all the boxes and cans inhabiting the pantry were the seraphim and cherubim of the new culinary creed, surely the freezer was the realm of the archangels: beings named Swanson and Birdseye. Adherents to this frozen form of the faith didn't even have to mix and measure. All they had to do was open a box and peel back the foil. And, alas, although my mother could cook and did cook once upon a time, by the time I made my first forays into the kitchen, she was singing in the “convenience” choir.

In later years, I could ask her for help – “Mom, what's the flour-to-fat ratio for a bechamel?” – and she'd have the answer. She never forgot how to cook; she, like millions of other American women, just chose to spend the '60s and '70s wandering in the processed food wasteland.

I frequently cook when visiting friends and relatives and I often find myself puzzled by a general lack of “stuff” in most of their kitchens. I have a ridiculously well-equipped kitchen, replete with racks of gleaming stainless steel pots and pans hanging along with a variety of non-stick aluminum and cast iron cookware. Stock pots and Dutch ovens live in a lower cabinet. Knives glisten on magnetic strips mounted on the wall above an assortment of cutting boards. I have a microwave, of course, but I also have an induction burner at the ready and a countertop oven with a rotisserie feature. Besides my heavy duty KitchenAid mixer and it's attachments, there's a food processor, a blender, and an immersion blender near at hand. A ricer? Yep. Second drawer. A slow cooker? Two of them over on the open wire shelving. Glass and metal mixing bowls of all sizes line upper cabinet shelves. You want a whisk? There are six of them in a canister on the counter. How about a microplane grater? It's hanging above the drawer where I keep my mandolin slicer. The sea salt is next to the Kosher salt which is near the Maldon flake salt, the Himalayan pink salt, and the French grey salt, all of which are on a Lazy Susan with the grinders containing the black peppercorns and the white peppercorns. And don't get me started on the bakeware. So I am completely nonplussed when I visit a kitchen and can't find a rolling pin. (I have three.) What do you mean you don't have a measuring cup? Or a wooden spoon? How do you cook? Oh. You don't. The more I've thought about it, the more I've realized that it's a symptom of the same condition: one doesn't need kitchen equipment to open a box or a can or to pop something in the microwave. “Quick” and “Easy” still have a lot of disciples.

An examination of my pantry and fridge demonstrates my evolution. Where once there were cans of Franco-American spaghetti there are now packages of dried pasta and cans of San Marzano tomatoes with which to make sauce. I used to love Rice a Roni and always had a few boxes of the chicken variety on hand. Years ago, I replicated the recipe in my kitchen and while I still enjoy the dish, I now make it from scratch. You know those handy little packets of sauce mixes you find in the grocery store? You won't find them in my pantry. What you will find are the real, honest-to-goodness, preservative-free ingredients to make them from scratch. And to make them better than the packaged stuff. I used to use the execrable cheese-flavored crap in a green cardboard or plastic can to flavor my Italian dishes until I discovered real Italian Parmigiano-Reggiano. There's no comparison. And there's no wood fiber filler in the real thing. My larder is not completely barren of cans and boxes: besides the aforementioned tomatoes, I have cans and boxes of broth that I use for soups and sauces when I don't have homemade broth or stock on hand.

Frozen pizza? Once upon a time, but not in a very long time. Not when I can turn out fresh pizza dough and homemade sauce better than DiGiorno and faster than Dominos.

I haven't bought “sandwich” bread in years. No store-bought, gummy, nutrition-less bread-like substances live in my breadbox. And you won't find rolls of “dinner rolls” in my fridge, either. Not when real bread and rolls are so delicious and so easy to make. And you won't find rolls of pre-made cookie dough in my refrigerator. Unless you count the dough my wife made using real ingredients that she then rolled and wrapped and stuck in the freezer so we can enjoy real, fresh cookies whenever we want them. In fact, there are no boxes of cake mix, brownie mix, or frosting mix anywhere in our kitchen. That's why we have flour and eggs and cocoa and sugar and milk and butter. You know, real ingredients for real food.

My idea of cooking breakfast involves cracking eggs, frying bacon, and dicing up potatoes, not pulling a waffle-like disc or a “breakfast sandwich” out of the freezer.

I'm not gonna lie: there are a few cans of ready-to-eat soup in the pantry. I've got a couple of little tubs of microwavable macaroni and cheese, too. And there are usually two or three frozen entrees around for quick lunches when need be. Some canned veg to throw in homemade soups and sauces. But that's really about it. I don't live on the preservative-laden products that will ultimately kill me. I did for many years, but now I just don't. And it's liberating as hell to be able to walk past all that garbage in the grocery store knowing I can do better, tastier, and healthier myself. And so can you.

I know I'm like a former smoker or a reformed alcoholic. I realize I can be incredibly annoying up there on my soapbox. I was getting some butter at the grocery store the other day. My wife was over by the milk and a lady said to her, “They've moved everything around. Do you know where the butter is?” My wife pointed toward where I was standing. The lady thanked her, came over my way.......and grabbed a package of Blue Bonnet! It was all I could do not to scream, “That's not butter!! Why are you trying to kill yourself?!” I know. I'm horrible.

But, dammit, there's a reason ex-smokers and ex-drinkers and ex-fake food eaters all crusade the way we do: we know better. We've all been through the valley and now we dwell on the mountaintop. And we just want everybody to join us up here to experience the freedom we enjoy. Freedom from harmful, life-threatening substances.

Okay, I'm gonna shut up now before I go all Sylvester Graham on you. (If you don't know, look it up.) Just do this for me: make the route from your mouth to your stomach pass through your brain. Read labels, do research, figure out what all that stuff is and what it does. Think about what you're putting into your body before you put it in there. Even if you can't make all the right decisions all the time, how about at least making fewer of the wrong ones? Big Food is not your friend, my friends. ConAgra, General Mills, Kraft, et al don't have an altruistic bone in their entire greedy corporate bodies. They are not out to make you happy and healthy; they are out to make a buck at any cost and the cost is usually your health and happiness.

Think, question, and think some more. I'll save you a soapbox on my mountaintop.

Forget About McDonald's Mozzarella Sticks And Make Your Own

Channeling Clara Peller: “Where's The Cheese”

The food world came to a crashing halt recently as word spread across the Internet that McDonald's newest menu addition – fried mozzarella sticks – apparently didn't contain any actual mozzarella. Scores of photos of breaded shells devoid of cheese popped up everywhere, leading to the question, “Where's the cheese?” If a competitor wanted to be really canny, said competitor could revive Wendy's old “Where's the Beef” gimmick with a cheesy twist. Of course, dear old Clara Peller has long since departed for that Great Fast-Food Restaurant in the Sky, but, hey, if the Madison Avenue types can resurrect Colonel Sanders for a modern ad campaign, why not the “Beef” lady?

The controversy has grown to such proportions that a guy in California has actually filed a class-action lawsuit seeking 5 mil in damages, accusing the Chicago-based burger meisters of fraudulent and misleading advertising. According to the claim, some 3.76 percent of the cheese portion of the sticks in question is actually starch filler. Federal guidelines reportedly prohibit the use of starch in products that are labeled "mozzarella cheese," hence the basis for the fraud charge. Like somebody actually expected McDonald's to use mozzarella di bufala?

My wife and I stopped by a local Mickey D's and ordered a couple of orders of the offending side item and found them to be just average old mozzarella sticks of the variety available at cheap faux-Italian restaurants everywhere. Served with a little cup of unremarkable marinara, they were pretty standard fare, and, yes, there was cheese in both orders. Although I do understand the phenomenon; I've gotten empty sticks at other places on occasion.

Two things come into play: the quality of the product and the ability of the cook. I haven't been back in the kitchen, but I can almost guarantee that McDonald's does not have a little Italian nonna back there hand breading hand cut batons of fresh mozzarella. No, it's more likely that they are frozen sticks of heavily breaded cheap cheese product and it's equally likely that they are being fried to within an inch of their existence, which is another reason the cheese would cease to exist. In addition to the California dude's probably correct assertion that the “cheese” in McDonald's sticks leaves something to be desired, the real problem is that the skills of the people frying them also leave something to be desired. Quickest way to bust a mozzarella stick wide open is to overcook that rascal. Even so-called “low moisture” cheese has some moisture in it, and what happens when water/moisture hits the boiling point? Steam, of course. Considering that the average boiling point of water is about 212° and that the average temperature of frying oil is upwards of 350°, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that explosive steam expansion is gonna happen if you throw something wet into the fryer and leave it there for several minutes. You wanna know where the cheese in the cheese sticks winds up? Check the fryer filters.

Anyway, I've got a better solution. Forget all that angst on Instagram and don't rush headlong to join that cheesy lawsuit. Instead, just make your own fried mozzarella, or mozzarella fritta, as it's called in Italian. It's really not that hard and the results are a darn sight better than any you'll find at McDonald's or at most of the aforementioned faux-Italian places. Here's how you do it.

You'll need:

Mozzarella cheese

Flour, seasoned with salt and pepper

Eggs

Bread crumbs

Oil for frying

If you can find fresh mozzarella, great. Otherwise, the typical block cheese found in supermarkets will work.

You can use Italian breadcrumbs if you want to zip up the flavor a little. Otherwise, plain breadcrumbs are fine.

Use a neutral oil like canola for frying.

The method I'm about to describe assumes that you'll be shallow frying in a frying pan or a Dutch oven. I actually have a deep fryer, but I know not everyone does. A fryer makes this a quicker and easier process, but pan frying works just fine.

Okay, here's what you do:

Cut the mozzarella into slices or sticks about 1/2 inch thick. Slices work better with fresh cheese because it comes in rounds. The block cheese makes for better sticks. Your choice. Whichever way you go, pat off any excess moisture with paper towels, especially if you're going with fresh mozzarella.

Heat some oil in a deep, heavy-bottomed pan. A cast iron skillet is good; so is a Dutch oven, especially the ceramic coated cast iron ones like those made by Lodge or Le Creuset. You don't need quarts of oil; just enough to completely immerse the cheese sticks. You want your oil to hit a temperature of about 350°. If you don't have a thermometer, and old trick is to drop a crumb of bread into the oil. If it sizzles immediately, the oil is ready.

While you're waiting for the oil to heat, lay out three shallow bowls. Beat the eggs in one. Put some flour in another and some breadcrumbs in the third. This is called a “breading station.” The order for breading just about everything can be remembered by thinking of the abbreviation for February: F-E-B – flour, eggs, breadcrumbs. (There's your Cooking 101 tip for the day.)

Press the cheese slices or sticks into the flour, coating them evenly. Shake off any excess flour and dip the sticks or slices into the eggs, then into the breadcrumbs. Now go back and hit the eggs again and take one more dive into the breadcrumbs. This provides a nice double-coated breading that will hold up better in the high-temp frying conditions.

Working in small batches, carefully add the breaded cheese to the oil. Fry just until golden brown. About a minute will usually do it. Watch closely; if they sit too long, you might as well pack up and go to McDonald's. If you're not using a deep fryer, turn the sticks once while frying to ensure even cooking on both sides. Fish the sticks or slices out with a slotted spoon or similar utensil and drain them on paper towels. Serve 'em up hot, fresh, and delicious.

A little time saving variation here: you can prepare your mozzarella sticks in advance and freeze them for later use. Just lay out your prepared cheese sticks on a wax paper lined baking sheet. When you get a sheet full, cover them with plastic and stick them in the freezer for a couple of hours. Once they're frozen, you can remove them to zip top freezer bags and keep them frozen for a day or two. Don't hold them too long, though: if they build up ice crystals, they'll fry up about the same as the cheap store-bought sticks – or the things they use at McDonald's. Fresh is best, overnight is okay, more than a day or so and you're pushing quality.

There you have it; mozzarella sticks guaranteed to have cheese in every bite.

Buona fortuna e buon appetito!

Food Gifts For The Holidays (And Any Other Time)

Order Great Food From These Places Any Time Of Year

The holidays are here and it's time for (trumpet fanfare) my first annual holiday food gift guide. To be honest, I'll probably list the same places for my second, third, and any subsequent holiday food gift guides, just because they're that good. And don't be stuck on the “holiday” aspect. You can order great food from these places any time of year, whether for gifts or just as a treat for yourself.

Bear in mind, these are not places I picked at random through an online search: these are quality producers I have actually visited and frequented and whose products I use myself. Most are artisans who carefully handcraft their goods. A couple are commercial manufacturers, but they produce a quality product that I appreciate and am happy to recommend.

Let's begin with chocolate.

Nestled up in the peaks of the Blue Ridge mountains near Asheville is the little town of Black Mountain, North Carolina. It's a great little vacation spot and a mecca for antique shoppers. It's also where Black Mountain Chocolate got its start. Their logo says “Crafted From The Bean,” and that's what makes Black Mountain Chocolate's chocolate so good. Black Mountain Chocolate is an Ecole Chocolat Certified Chocolate Maker. They start with fresh cocoa beans, which they roast, crack, winnow, and grind right there in their factory. Then they further hand craft all that chocolate goodness into a variety of finished products that include incredible small batch chocolate bars, chocolate treats like cocoa nib granola and chocolate pecan butter, and a unique drinking chocolate that is unlike any you've had before.

You can order online or you can visit the factory and kitchen and buy direct at the source. But don't plan a trip to Black Mountain just yet because they moved the whole shebang to Winston-Salem, North Carolina awhile back. The new digs are in the heart of the artsy district of downtown Winston-Salem at 732 N. Trade Street. You can call them at 336-293-4698. You can also follow them on Facebook or log on to http://www.blackmountainchocolate.com. I promise, once you've had Black Mountain Chocolate, you'll never eat another Hershey bar.

A day without bacon is like a day without joy. And no place on earth is more joyful than Madisonville, Tennessee, home to Benton's Smoky Mountain Country Hams.

Allen Benton produces pork products par excellence. His eponymous country hams are, indeed, legendary, and he makes a prosciutto worthy of any Italian artisan. But it's Benton's bacon that makes the world beat a path to his door – literally. Allen's place is located on the outskirts of Madisonville, a hamlet just a little ways south of Knoxville and a stone's throw away from the Great Smoky Mountains. And I've never been in the place that I haven't found Allen chatting with somebody from California or Florida or Texas or New York. Or China. Or Australia. Seriously. There isn't a chef worth his Michelin star that doesn't drool over Benton's bacon and Allen's client list reads like a James Beard “Who's Who.” Besh, Brock, Chang, Colicchio, Keller – a veritable roll call of top chefs.

So, if the stuff's so great, why can't you run down to your local Kroger and buy a pound? Oh, it's not for a lack of effort on the part of national grocery chains. Several of them have approached Allen about distributing his product. But Allen makes bacon the way his grandparents made it back in Scott County, Virginia and if he were to sell out to Kroger, et.al., he'd have to change the way he makes his bacon, and he ain't about to do it. And, frankly, with dozens of world-renowned chefs buying the stuff in hundred-pound increments, he doesn't have to.

You can follow the path to Allen Benton's door at 2603 Highway 411 N. in Madisonville, Tennessee. Or you can call him at 423-442-5003. Or just go online at http://bentonscountryhams2.com and order the pinnacle of pork products for yourself.

Not too far up the road from Allen Benton's Madisonville smokehouse is the the town of Philadelphia, Tennessee. There's not a lot happening in Philadelphia, located just off I-75 on the way to or from Knoxville. It's kind of a quiet place. I mean, how much noise can 533 people make? But cows? Now that's a different story. The cows out on West Lee Highway at Sweetwater Valley Farm make a lot of noise – and some the best cheese you'll ever eat.

The billboards along I-75 read, “Cheese. Cows. Wows!” And I heartily agree with the “wows” part. Well....I agree about the cheese and the cows, too, but “wow” is all you can say once you've been there. Sweetwater Valley Farm produces award-winning cheeses, which, although produced in a modern, state-of-the-art facility, preserve the fine art and craft of making cheese in a traditional, old-fashioned farmstead manner. The folks at Sweetwater Valley Farm control the entire process from cow to consumer in order to create the highest quality cheddar cheese available on the market today. Colby, mild cheddar, sharp cheddar, smoked cheddar, and a variety of flavored cheddars like salsa cheddar, tomato-herb cheddar, and roasted garlic pepper cheddar are just the beginning.

Like Benton's bacon, you can't buy Sweetwater Valley Farm cheese in the grocery store. And probably for the same reasons. But you can stop by the farm at 17988 W. Lee Highway in Philadelphia, you can call them at 865-458-9192 or toll free at 877-862-4332, or you can check them out online at http://www.sweetwatervalley.com. Any way you slice it, Sweetwater Valley Farm's cheese will make you say “wow!”

While we're on the subject of cheese, let's scoot on over to North Carolina where Ashe County Cheese is among the most popular tourist attractions in the state. Originally started by Kraft in the 1930s as part of the company's efforts to consolidate several small cheese plants in the area, the facility has undergone many changes over the years. It is currently under the ownership of an award-winning Wisconsin Master Cheesemaker, producing everything from old style cheddar daisy wheels to a wide variety of cheeses and butter, including its original Sienna cheese, its many flavored cheeses, and its newest variety, Juusto cheese – a mild Scandinavian cheese. Cheese curds are a Wisconsin staple and Ashe County Cheese has 'em. They also have a delicious Mountain Gouda and a couple of varieties of hard to find hoop cheese, a traditional cheese made only from milk.

Ashe County cheese products are available at several specialty shops and farmers markets in North Carolina. The best place to go, though, is right to the source. They have a huge showroom in West Jefferson, North Carolina and they make cheese several days a week, so don't be surprised to find a tour bus parked out front at 106 E. Main Street. Of course, if West Jefferson is not exactly on your way home, you can call them at 336-246-2501 or visit online at http://www.ashecountycheese.com.

And what's cheese without bread? La Farm Bakery in Cary, North Carolina is an amazing place. It's a little bit of France transplanted to a growing community in The Triangle area that also includes Raleigh, Durham, and Chapel Hill. French-trained Maitre Boulanger (Master Baker) and James Beard Award semifinalist Lionel Vatinet produces bread that will change your perception of bread, especially if all you've ever had for reference is awful store-bought stuff. I've baked all my own breads for many years, and Lionel's stunningly beautiful and delicious loaves of pure ambrosia simply make me weep. Rustic Italian, Pain de Mie, Ciabatta, and Challah are just a few of the fantastic breads you'll discover. And that doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of all the wonderful cakes, cookies, tarts, and other delectable baked goods made fresh every day.

Unfortunately, all these goodies are fresh, wholesome, and natural, made with only the finest ingredients, most locally sourced, and are completely preservative free. That means if you live in California, say, and want a loaf boxed up and sent to your door......it probably ain't gonna happen. Most of La Farm's awesome products are only available in store. They also sell to a variety of Raleigh-area Whole Foods stores and farmers markets. BUT.....don't despair: La Farm does offer a limited selection of breads in a sampler that is available for delivery. They also have a signature gift basket and a variety of mixes and other products available for shipment as gifts. (Of course, if you order them and don't give them to anybody, who's to know?)

When I'm in the area, I will literally go a hundred miles out of my way to stop in Cary and stock up at La Farm. It doesn't hurt that they also have a great little cafe on premises that serves fabulous fare made from the fruits of their labors. It's all located in the Preston Corners Shopping Center at 4248 NW Cary Parkway in Cary. Call them at 919-657-0657 or check them out at https://www.lafarmbakery.com.

“Sweet In Every Sense Since 1947,” Kilwins Chocolate Kitchen is known for its rich and creamy ice cream. And if you've never had it, there aren't enough “o”s in “good” to really describe it. But there's so much more to Kilwins – fortunate since ordering ice cream by mail is an “iffy” proposition. Headquartered in Michigan, there are Kilwins stores all over the place; there's probably one near you. I've got two of them within an hour's drive. But just in case, they also do a brisk mail order business, bringing some of the best chocolates, fudges, caramel corn, brittles, and toffees you've ever put in your mouth right to your door. There are shipping restrictions on some of their more perishable products, so maybe a Kilwins gift card might be a good idea. As I said, there are stores all over the place. A bunch of them are in “touristy”places like the aforementioned Black Mountain, North Carolina, Blowing Rock, North Carolina, Gatlinburg, Tennessee, Lake Geneva, Wisconsin, Branson, Missouri, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and on just about every street corner in Florida. But there are a lot of them in “regular” locations, too. Besides the ice cream, I'm a big fan of the caramel corn, but there's not a single thing in the inventory that I wouldn't gladly make that hour's drive to get. Really. Check 'em out at https://www.kilwins.com.

While we're on the topic of snacks, I would be terribly remiss if I failed to mention a couple of my all-time favorite snack sources. I never met a potato chip I didn't like, but I really love Utz Potato Chips. Utz chips are at home in Hanover, Pennsylvania but they are found in homes all along the Eastern Seaboard from Maine to Georgia. And beyond, thanks to a burgeoning mail order business.

I like Utz chips for the full potato flavor and light texture, but the thing I most appreciate is the comparative lack of sodium. At 95 mg, Utz chips have about half the sodium of almost every other chip on the market. (There's 170 mg in Lays.) In fact, after years of enjoying the natural potato taste of Utz, I find other chips way too salty.

Of course, Utz is more than just potato chips. They have a full line of snack products – pretzels, cheese balls, potato sticks, and much more. My wife is particularly partial to their popcorn. Last time we were in Hanover, we stopped at the Utz Factory Store and stocked up on our favorites. But you don't have to make a pilgrimage to Pennsylvania to enjoy Utz in your home. Just head to http://utzsnacks.com and order to your heart's content. But if you do happen to be in Hanover – say you've just visited nearby Hershey or Gettysburg – pop in to 861 Carlisle Street and prepare to be delighted.

One more, and it's mostly a nostalgia entry. As a kid growing up just north of Chicago, my love of potato chips was nurtured by Jays. As the slogan says, “Can't Stop Eating 'Em.” And that's been true for more than 80 years. In those pre-Internet ordering days, Jay's chips were only available in or near the Chicago area, so I lost touch with my first love when I moved out of Chicagoland around age 10. I'd stock up from time to time on visits back home, but, alas, they were a fleeting pleasure. Until the World Wide Web made all things possible. And that includes having Jays signature Jays Potato Chips, Jays Ridges Potato Chips, Jays Waves Potato Chips, Jays Kettle Cooked Potato Chips, and a full line of other snacks like shoestring potato sticks (my other favorite), pork rinds, corn chips and cheese puffs delivered right to my door. And again, my wife is addicted to their popcorn, marketed under the O-KE-DOKE label.

Sadly, the Jays products that I knew and loved as a child, the ones made by the Japp family at a manufacturing plant in the Windy City, are gone now, absorbed into a larger snack conglomerate and distributed as a subsidiary of Snyder's of Hanover. On the bright side, I stumbled upon some Jays chips recently and found that, even though that nostalgic “hometown” element is gone, the folks at Snyders – coincidentally also based in Hanover, Pennsylvania – have done a fine job of retaining the character of the product so it remains largely as it was when I experienced my first blush of crispy potato infatuation. Happily, even today I “Can't Stop Eating 'Em,” and I would encourage you to eat some, too. Find Jays products online at http://www.snyderslance.com/branddetails/brandjays.

Happy Holidays! And if you happen to be reading this in June, remember it's never too early to plan for the future.